He’s «Matchmaking» Another Woman. Carry out I Give Him an Ultimatum?

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He’s «Matchmaking» Another Woman. Carry out I Give Him an Ultimatum?

Reader matter:

we found some guy online which resides 500 miles away. He’s 34 and I also’m 53. He performed tell me he had a lady the guy dated «locally» and therefore he had been only on the site shopping for buddies. 3 months later on we understood we emotions per some other.

Meanwhile, he however suggests he is experiencing difficulity along friends with benefits sites his girlfriend, who isn’t some one he’s «dating» in your area. He is managing this lady plus they’ve already been with each other for four years.

At long last chose we’d to meet to see if this is well worth seeking. He gave me the reason the guy failed to consider it absolutely was to take action as he was still together with her. I finally offered him an ultimatum and told him i possibly couldn’t perform next fiddle. The guy professed his love but said he had been very perplexed.

Would we provide him ultimatum, it really is her or me? Have always been I wrong to inquire of him to create that decision?

-Nancy (Florida)

Dr Wendy Walsh’s Response:

Oh Nancy, Nancy, Nancy! You wrote if you ask me for sincerity, correct? Well, could you be seated? Because right here comes a honey cooking pot of fact.

You may be staying in dream land, my personal beloved girl. You’ve not also found this person which might or might not end up being men and who might or might not have a girlfriend.

I highly recommend the truth is the documentary «Catfish» (available on iTunes and Netflix) about an on-line love con.

But even though you you shouldn’t do this, let’s assume for a moment he is actually exactly who according to him he could be and disregard the fact he began composing to you personally by sleeping about their union position.

Let’s only check out the so-called realities.

A.) He’s nearly twenty years younger than you.

B.) He is in a significant commitment.

C.) The guy said right from the start he’s just trying end up being buddies.

And so I ask you, exactly why might you exposure the cardiovascular system on these types of a poor bet?

The question really should not be about providing him an ultimatum, but instead, in the event you allow yourself the love you have earned?

If that’s the case, next this is simply not the pony you need to ride to the sunset with. Manage, girl!

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